Let’s Talk About It

Questions & Prompts to Enhance Sexual Communication

Sexual intimacy is more than physical activity. It is emotional, relational, embodied, and within the Christian faith, spiritual.

Many Christians grow up receiving mixed messages about sex. Some are shaped by silence. Others by shame. Others by strong convictions but little practical guidance for communication.

This resource is designed to create space for thoughtful, honest, and respectful conversations about sexuality. It invites curiosity rather than pressure, compassion rather than criticism, and connection rather than performance.

These prompts are not designed to create “perfect” answers. They are designed to help you know one another more deeply.

Whether you are single, dating, engaged, or married, your understanding of sexuality matters. Your story matters. Your body matters. Your faith matters.

For Couples

These questions and prompts are best approached slowly and intentionally.

1. Set the tone

  • Choose a time when you are not rushed or emotionally heightened.

  • Pray together if that feels meaningful for you.

  • Agree that curiosity is more important than correctness.

2. Go one question at a time

You do not need to move quickly.

Some couples may choose:

  • 1–3 questions per week

  • A dedicated “connection evening”

  • Or selecting a random prompt when ready

3. Listen before responding

The goal is to listen to understand.

Try:

  • “Tell me more about that.”

  • “What makes that important to you?”

  • “How did that shape you?”

4. Respect differences

You may not agree on everything. That does not mean something is wrong. Differences can be navigated with patience, clarity, and kindness.

5. Pause if needed

If a prompt brings up strong emotion or past trauma:

  • Take a break.

  • Slow your breathing.

  • Revisit the conversation another time.

  • Consider seeking pastoral or professional support if needed.

Not all the questions and prompts will be suitable or applicable for you depending on your stage in the relationship. If some of the prompts and questions are pre-matature for your relationship, they are still worth reflecting on individually.

If you are married, my hope is that you will be able to skip some of the questions and prompts- because you have already discussed these topics!

For Singles

Sexual reflection is not only for marriage. It is part of healthy formation.

These questions and prompts can help you:

  • Understand your beliefs and values.

  • Identify areas of shame or confusion.

  • Clarify your boundaries.

  • Grow in body awareness and emotional insight.

  • Prepare for future relationships with intentionality.

You may choose to:

  • Journal your responses.

  • Pray through specific themes.

  • Discuss with a trusted mentor or counsellor.

  • Revisit questions as your views mature.

Important Considerations

  • These prompts are not a substitute for therapy.

  • They are not designed to pressure sexual activity.

  • They are not a test of spiritual maturity.

  • They are an invitation to deeper honesty.

If you or your partner have experienced sexual trauma, coercion, or significant distress around sexuality, professional support may be helpful before engaging some of these prompts.

A Final Word

Healthy sexual intimacy is not built through technique alone.

It grows through:

  • Emotional safety

  • Mutual respect

  • Clear communication

  • Spiritual integration

  • And a willingness to keep learning

May these conversations foster greater clarity, tenderness, and connection in your life and relationships.

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